That One Time I Barely Survived Hitchhiking
Right after I turned 18, my boyfriend and I were at Bentley’s coffee shop, and I was going to spend the night at his apartment at River and La Canada. Problem was, neither of us had a car and it was 11pm, so no buses. Being idiots, we naturally decided to hitchhike…
The Candy Corn Incident
I’m not sure how old I was, but I can’t have been older than about 8 or 9. It was near Halloween and my mom, or maybe Sonia, had given me a bag of candy corn. At the time this was one of my favorite candies.
I had been given the absurd limitation of two pieces per day. Considering how tiny these are, and that most people eat them by the fistful, it was nearly...
Taos Skiers Beware
I was 11 the Christmas my mother gave me my own pair of skis and told me she was taking me to Taos. I had never been skiing and I was very excited. I can’t remember if it was a business trip, but I think it probably was. Most of my childhood travel that didn’t involve visiting relatives involved tagging along with my mom on business.
Taos was having a bad year for snow. The...
Misty the Wonder Horse
When I was growing up, my godmother, Barrie, had a horse named Misty. She was all white and generally very friendly. One of my earlier memories of her was being totally grossed out when she licked my hand and the spit foamed up. I’ve always been an animal lover, and horses are no exception. I loved to ride Misty when I got the chance…
Oddly, Misty sometimes had other ideas.
When I was three or...
I Survived a State Mental Hospital
My mom talked my (now-ex)husband into committing me to the mental ward when I was 5 months pregnant. I’d gone off my medication (Lithium and Paxil) and kinda flipped out. What I needed, of course, was my medication (which I apparently refused to take, but after a few hours of TV or something I probably would have taken willingly). Then I would have calmed right down. After sitting around the ER for about 45 minutes...
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The McDonald's Gunman
Back in early ’91 when I was still just dating my husband, I used to go to the McDonald’s where he worked to hang out. I’d order some fries or a Big Mac with no meat and sit and read, and when he had a few minutes I’d chat with him, and when he went on break to eat, we’d sit and talk. This particular evening, my friend Star was with me and we were...
Dissecting a Fetal Pig
I attended a Christian school from second grade through the first semester of seventh grade. In science at my tiny religious school, we’d been learning about plants. We’d dissected a flower, examined onion skin under a microscope… cut open lima beans… pretty simple stuff. Over winter break my mom FINALLY decided to let me go to public school. So I landed in a new school and a new science class.
This new science class...
I Fall Down, Go Boom--a brief history of clumsiness
Some of my more spectacular spills over the years…
Dog Bite
This is one of my oldest vivid memories…
When I was almost three years old, I was in Connecticut visiting my grandparents. I was with my grandmother at a friend’s house when a little dog came wandering in. It was a Dachshund… a weiner dog. Apparently I decided to feed him a cracker. I remember bending over and handing him something, and I remember him lunging for my face. I also remember seeing something in...
Disowned?
From the time I was a little girl I had a close relationship with my godmother, Barrie. She lived with Kathleen, and they were lovers. I didn’t really catch on to this until some time around the beginning of high school, but that is my problem.
I loved Barrie and Kathleen like family. I considered them to BE family. Growing up I often spent weekends at their place out in the foothills, taking long baths...
